Monday, August 25, 2008

My name is Kim...and I'm a Target-aholic

Okay peeps, remember my epiphany a few days ago? Remember how I was going to really think about life, and how lucky I have it? I was determined to count my blessings, and be glad for all my fortunate-ness? Well, today Target ruined it all.

On a whim, I stopped by Target on my way home to grab some fresh eggs (I was inspired to bake chocolate chip cookies for Brad when he gets home from Vegas on Thursday). I needed eggs. Nothing. Else.

Now I know me pretty well, having been around myself for 20 some odd years. I know that Target = purchases (of the unnecessary variety). Therefore as I parked the car and began the walk into the store, I provided myself the following pep talk:

"You are here for eggs. Eggs. From a chicken. You don't need anything in this store unless it derives from a chicken and is packaged in a very fragile white membrane casing. Eggs, Kim. Eggs. Not Egg-O's. If memory serves, they are not from a chicken. Just eggs." As an extra precaution, I forwent the provided red grocery baskets to further discourage myself from superfluous purchases. Go me.

Surprisingly I found myself heading straight for the refrigerated section of the store. I selected my 18 eggs (I only need two for chocolate chip cookies. Target is the devil.) and headed back toward the front of the store.

I really wish I could tell you I ended up in the women's clothes section because it's directly adjacent to the egg department. Even more, I wish I could tell you that I arrived at the cash register with the exact same sweater I turned down on Thursday because I was planning a trip to Good Will to make a donation. But no, at the register I had in my possession: 18 eggs, one DVD, the sweater (that still wasn't on sale), cottage cheese, yogurt, and a Tide bleach pen. Further complicating matters, I was balancing all of these items in my rather uncoordinated arms. Because the basket encourages unnecessary shopping, you'll remember.

All wasn't lost though. At the last second, I grumbled at the cashier that I didn't really need the bleach pen or the sweater after all. This is the second time I have had that adorable sweater in my hands and put it back. I am the poster child for self control. As far as the other purchases rationale goes, the DVD was two movies in one case for only $9.00. They were giving that thing away. I need the cottage cheese to go with dinner, and everyone needs more yogurt in their diet. So, in the end, I came into Target for one thing, and left with four. One day at a time...


Missie said...

Hey your lucky that your husband lets you go to Target. Brent has banned me from going in without him, something about me picking up crap that I dont need? I really wasn't listening at the time of the lecture because the birthday present we went there for that day, turned into $200 worth of who knows what!!! Considering that was over a year ago, I am having Target withdrawls!!!!!!!!!!!!

erin said...

Target is the devil sprawn. Seriously. Their color is red for a reason. I think I should put a Target alarm on me, so that when I get 400 feet from the doors, it sounds and immediately calls Jared for back-up.

antisdel said...

I can see it now... The Target Alarm: Available at all fine Target Stores. But once you come in, we won't let you out! Mwuah ha ha ha ha ha!