Friday, April 2, 2010

gone with the wind

Setting:

  • This morning, my house. 10:15-ish.  
  • Sky color, gray.
  • Me, working furiously away at computer.
  • Hubs, cleaning up house while I work.

Aaaaand go...
 

Hubs: (calling up the stairs to my office) Babe?! What are you doing? 

Me: Hrmpgh.

Hubs:  (Louder) I just looked at the weather, and there's no way we can go to Target for Easter stuff in the next five minutes.

Me: (Cursing at my mouse for not working properly) Why not?? It's just a little rain.  I'm not made of cotton candy or anything.

Hubs: (rolling eyes. (I assume)) I'm serious, babe.  It's going to get bad in a second.

Me: (to myself) Whatever, wimpy boy.  I happen to love me some good thunderstormy weather. *snicker*

(minutes later)

Hubs: (calling up to my office again) Look outside! I told you!!

Me: (barely turning around in my chair in time to notice a piece of house siding floating through the completely BLACK SKY) Um...babe?  It  looks like it might be getting kind of -

Hubs: Cool! Our grill is rolling across the deck!  

(House shakes. And shakes again. No lie.)

Me: (Abandoning my computer and running down the stairs like Animal from the Muppets) IS IT A TORNADO????  BABY, IS THIS A TORNADOOOOO???!! 

Hubs: (looking calmly out the door at the clearly tornadic activity.) Hrmpgh.

Me: (running all over the living room, kitchen, bathroom) WHERE ARE THE CATS??  WHERE'S CUPCAKE??  WHERE'S OREO?  I WANT TO GO TO THE BASEMENT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Oh my God, I'm barefoot!!!  What if a window breaks!  Babe, get away from the window right now!!!  

(lights flicker and go out)

Me: (arms flailing) THE POWER'S OUT!  WHAT DO WE DO?  I CAN'T FIND MY SLIPPERS OR MY SHOES.  And I don't have a bra on. 

Hubs: (snickering) Which matters because?

Me: (running back up the stairs and muttering to myself) Uh, because if I get tossed three miles in the air and land without a shirt on, I don't need my boobies out for all to see.  Duh.

Hubs: (calling after me in his calmest I'm-Dealing-With-A-Third-Grader voice) Babe, really it's okay.  It's slowing down.  It's just hail and rain and less wind now.  You're scaring the cats.

Me: I HAVE TO PROTECT MY BABIESSSSSSS!!!

(several minutes later)

Me: (looking out the patio doors at the small amount of damage to our neighborhood) Wow, that was intense.  Our neighbors have a lot of siding gone, and look!  The decorative metal top of our patio table came off!  I wonder where that went? 

Hubs: I'm sure we can find it. 

Me:  But if we don't find it, how are we going to eat outside this summer? That's an IKEA table, it's not like we can just run over there and pick up another one. The table will look ridiculous!
Hubs: Let's just go to Target.

Me:  (Light bulb on) Yes! Oooh, we need to buy a weather radio.

Hubs: If you would just listen to me when I tell you bad weather is coming, you wouldn't need a weather radio. 

Me: Whatever.  

****
 
Hope you have a fantastic weekend and thunderstorm-free Easter!

2 comments:

ManoloChooLou said...

Ah, tornadoes. Back when I still lived in Nebraska, our neighbor's trampoline came through our basement window during a "mild" one.

Did you end up getting the Easter stuff? Stupid weather...

Wendy said...

I love it! We had an earthquake on Easter, which was not nearly as exciting.